I Don’t Fuck Men who Fuck Men
Everyone needs standards and this is my new one. Not that I’ve ever fucked a man who fucks other men (to the best of my knowledge) but there comes a time in your life when you realize there are some things that you can’t be cool with. And that is my limit.
I met a dude on Craig’s List from Lichtenstein. I don’t know much about Lichtenstein but I already like the place. It’s small unobtrusive and damn cool to say. Just say, “Lichtenstein” a few times.
He was in his late 30’s and was an investment banker. He looked relatively normal in his photo and I was intrigued even more after a 20 minute phone conversation in which he told me about Lichtenstein.
We went out for sushi a couple days ago. I thought I spotted a wedding ring on his hand, but I initially ignored it.
As we ate the fantastic sushi dinner he revealed that he was married and had a 12 year old daughter. When he told me that in my head I thought, “Not interested. It’s over.” But I carried on pretending to be interested. Hell, I even ordered dessert.
As we were sitting at table his phone rang.
“Your wife?” I joked.
He declined the call and smiled coyly. “Oh, you’ll never guess,” he said.
“Your butcher, your baker, your candlestick maker,” I said, fairly uninterested yet somewhat curious.
“No,” he laughed.
“Right. Then who?”
“Well,” he said, taking a deep breath. “I am really into transsexuals.”
“Oh cool,” I said as if I were hardly bothered.
But in my head I was saying, “JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! ARE THERE NO ‘NORMAL’ MEN IN LONDON? I’ve already had a
tranny. I don’t want a tranny-lover.”
Lichtenstein dude went on to explain that he only likes the very feminine looking trannies. Oh, well THAT makes it okay!
And even though he’s from a quiet village in Lichtenstein and has polite Austrian wife and normal 12-year-old daughter, for the past 5 years on his business trips out of town he’s been fucking and getting fucked by chicks with dicks.
Hey, whatever floats your boat, but not on my watch. That’s where I draw the line.
I was terribly polite the rest of the evening but I thought. “There is NO WAY in HELL I’m sleeping with him.”
I don’t fuck guys who fuck other guys. End of.
Labels: Lichtenstein, minimum standards, sushi, tranny, transexual, weirdos
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