My Thoughts on "My Girlfriend had Paid Sex with a Thai Boy"

OK, I've had a couple days to think about that e-mail sent to me a couple days ago.

Basically, I think the guy who wrote it is caught up in the racial aspect of it more so than the cheating part. From his name, which I withheld, and use of language I would assume that the guy is German.

I know that there are some very open-minded Germans out there-- but the ones that seem to gravitate to me all have what I would consider very outdated (from an American standpoint) opinions on race. Maybe this is something embedded in German culture-- I don't know. I do know that I will NEVER date anyone German again. I will, however, make an exception for Boris Becker.

Going back to the e-mail itself, "...I am a white guy and my German girlfriend had sex with an asian in Bangkok during our holidays," First I am going to have to assume that the German girlfriend is white. It is possible for the German girlfriend to be black, Asian or something else but the author doesn't specify. For the sake of the e-mail I've assumed she is white.

The wording of that sentence makes me feel uncomfortable. If your girlfriend cheats on you, then dump her. Does who she cheated on with make a difference? She's been unfaithful, chuck her out the door. So what if they guy she cheated with was Asian? Should she have cheated with someone white? Would that have made it better?

"After reading an article that also white girls pay for sex with young athletic thai guys, I went public with my experience to break the taboo of white male shame and to find out to how many white guys something similar happened and how they coped emotionally with the situation."

OK, here's something I know very little about-- what is this taboo of 'white male shame'? I asked two white guys (I know a very small sample) and neither of them had any idea what this author was on about. So I googled, "white male shame" and found an interesting article on "Fear of a black penis - white males' perceptions of black males - Man Trouble" but nothing that relates directly to white women and Asian men.

Incidentally, the article goes on to say regarding the Rodney King Verdict "The Simi Valley verdict showed that denial, rather than guilt, remains one of the strongest psychic mechanisms in the psychology of white supremacy"

If you're a white male and your girlfriend cheats on you with someone of a different race is that shameful? Why?

The race of the person your girlfriend cheats on shouldn't be as significant as the content of their character. (To paraphrase Rev. Martin Luther King). What if your girlfriend cheated on you with Lee Shau Kee? Does the fact that he's Asian make you shamed-face? Do you think you're better than him? He's a billionaire. What are you?

Telling me that your girlfriend cheated on you with an Asian in Bangkok tells me nothing. The only characteristic I know about the paramour is that he's Thai. My reaction to that is "so what." He's Thai and? There must be more? You can't simply reduce someone to a race and say that's it.

Tell me that the paramour is ugly, or good looking, a thief or a millionaire. Tell me that he's a law student or works in a sweatshop. Tell me details more than his race. THEN I can form an opinion.

Maybe your girlfriend slept with Thaksin Shinawatra. He's the former Prime Minister and he's pretty rich. I know a lot of women that would love to sleep with a guy with that sort of power and money. Yes, I would!

If I had been sent an e-mail that simply said, "My girlfriend had sex with someone else during our holidays." I would still stay dump her.

I am also curious how the girlfriend accounted for her time. I know that when I was on holiday with my ex-boyfriend we spent every second together. We were rarely apart. What kind of holiday do you go on where you or your girlfriend has hours and hours to play away?

Although I appreciate the author taking the time to send me the e-mail I feel that he has some superiority issues. I feel that his e-mail implied, "How dare my white girlfriend have sex with an Asian guy?" There is an implied superiority there that makes me uncomfortable.

There are possibly hundreds of reasons why she slept with that guy. Maybe she's attracted to Asian guys? Maybe she was horny and the author was in a business meeting? Maybe she just wanted to experiment-- I don't know. I just feel that the e-mail author is focusing too much on the fact that the guy his girlfriend cheated with was Asian. I think it's more important to focus on the fact that his girlfriend cheated on him.

"(google: "my girlfriend had paid sex with a thai boy" or got to
http://www.raincoatreviews.com/forums/member.php?u=6481"

• If your girlfriend paid to have sex that is a problem.
• If your girlfriend had sex with a boy (someone under 16 years of age) whether Thai or not that is a problem.
• To call Thai men 'boys' is a racist notion. If you mean to say "My girlfriend had paid sex with a Thai man" then say that.

I don't know what else to say, really. Sounds like the author has a lot of issues. Sounds like his girlfriend could possibly have some issues. I reckon that they deserve each other. And if he doesn't like my take on it, then he shouldn't have asked a black woman. That's all I'm sayin'

My Girlfriend had Paid Sex with a Thai Boy

I got an interesting e-mail today. Has anyone been in this situation?

Hi,


I read the interesting experience of Jim finding it hard, as an asian, to find a white girl. Always you hear that asian find it hard to date white women, it is a real cliche. But there are, I guess very rare examples, where it goes all the other way round. Especially in Thailand, which is supposed to be a heaven for white male dating thai girls. But it is probably still a big taboo, if, especially in Thailand, the tables are turned around.


...I am a white guy and my German girlfriend had sex with an asian in Bangkok during our holidays. For me it was a shock but we stayed together, although it traumatized me much. After reading an article that also white girls pay for sex with young athletic thai guys, I went public with my experience to break the taboo of white male shame and to find out to how many white guys something similar happened and how they coped emotionally with the situation .
(google: "my girlfriend had paid sex with a thai boy" or got to
http://www.raincoatreviews.com/forums/member.php?u=6481


It must be a total taboo, because I harvested a lot of hatred and unbelieve. It seems totally uncrompehensable, especially for white guys, that a white girl might enjoy sex with a thai and prefers it over sex with her white boyfriend, who finally accepts the situation and let his girl enjoy a thai fuck buddy during the couple's holidays. I reckon it is probably more "acceptable" that a white girl has sex with a black guy during a Jamaica holiday.


Please let me ask you, do you know any single white male or a white couple who went through a similar experience and want to exchange their view on it?


So far only one white male openly admitted to me that his white girl was also bedded by a persistent and willing thai beach boy. Like in my case the thai quickly suffocated any resistance and like in my case the girl did not feel sorry for having done it.


Maybe Jim is interested to hear this story,...to understand that he can have a white girl, even if media keeps ridiculing asian guys (small penis myth!). Today I respect them very much.

Lesbian Prostitutes?

After a few job interviews I ended the day by having dinner in Shoreditch with a friend of mine, Mandy and her husband Bob. After dinner we went to a pub for drinks. As it frequently does, the topic of sex came up. I was telling Mandy how I'm fascinated by Whore Amy's blog. Amy just took employment at a brothel and seemed to be really enjoying it.

Mandy, joking around with her husband asked, "Darling would you mind if I became a whore? We could use the extra money for an extension on the house."

Bob replied, "I don't have a problem with you having sex for money as long as you're only sleeping with women."

To which I replied, "Do lesbian prostitutes exist?"

"Sure they do," answered Bob. Mandy and I exchanged looks. We were both unsure of how Bob obtained this knowledge.

So I'm curious - do lesbian prostitutes exist? I would think that it would be hard to make a living that way. Maybe they are all part-timers? Do lesbians get horny enough to pay for sex?

I would appreciate if there's anyone who can shed light on this topic.

Now us Girls Can Pay for Sex too!

OK, I honestly can't think of a time when I wanted to pay for sex? Why pay, when you can get it for free -- better yet, why pay when you can get someone to pay you? Anyhow, IF I were in Nevada and IF I were single and IF I were horny and IF I had money to burn and IF I wanted to be guarenteed a great lay then maybe, possibly I would consider this. Maybe Tiger Wood's wife, Elin Nordegren can use this to get her revenge:

Las Vegas Sun: New era: Health authorities open brothels to male prostitutes!

By Marshall Allen (contact)
Friday, Dec. 11, 2009 | 11:08 a.m.

Men may now join the ranks of Nevada’s brothel prostitutes, after a unanimous decision today that added language to health codes so male sex workers could be tested for infectious diseases.

A brothel industry lobbyist -- in what could be considered a befuddling double standard -- bemoaned the change, comparing it to the industry’s “Pearl Harbor.” He managed to voice concerns about homosexual sex entering the industry without ever saying “gay sex” or “homosexual.”

Men were previously barred in Nevada from the oldest profession because codes specified that prostitutes must undergo “cervical” testing for sexually transmitted diseases, which ruled out men.

Bobbi Davis, owner of the Shady Lady Ranch, a small brothel near Beatty, wanted to add male prostitutes to her stable of sex workers.

And while there have been plans for brothels to hire men in the past, Davis made the first-ever request to have the Nevada State Board of Health add urethral exams to the guidelines. That allows male sex workers to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases.

Davis has said the men could start working at her five-bed brothel starting in the New Year. The male prostitutes will decide for themselves whether to accept male or female clients, she said, just as the female prostitutes do now.

The health board approved the change in what an attorney from the ACLU, representing Davis, called “housekeeping.”

George Flint, the former Assemblies of God minister who has been lobbying for the Nevada Brothel Owners Association for 24 years, said he “reluctantly -- and I underscore reluctantly” agrees to the change.

Flint refused to be interviewed by the Sun Thursday, and could not yet be reached for comment today. But because female prostitutes in Nevada service both men and women, his complaints about changing the status quo can be interpreted as a problem the industry has with gay sex.

Flint told regulators today that he was going on the record with concerns about the board’s agreement, so when he goes before legislators in 2011 they will know that the industry opposed male prostitution. The brother industry has previously tried to avoid any controversy.

“There should be some fallout and backlash from this decision,” Flint said. “Some may feel it’s a repugnant thing to do or something that does not have the appetite of the state as a whole.”

“We’ve worked hard for years to make the traditional brothel business in this state socially acceptable an something we can be proud of that most Nevadans accept,” Flint added. “We have some concerns that this can be diluted by what Ms. Bobbi Davis wants to try.”

Flint went on to say that he’s proud of the industry’s track record in preventing the passage of HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, between prostitutes and clients.

“Now we’re going to get into an areas that doesn’t enjoy the same track record that our industry has enjoyed,” he said.

Flint said he could not oppose the regulation change that allows male prostitution because it can’t be legal for women but not for men. But he said today’s decision was like Pearl Harbor for the brothel industry.

“It was inevitable with Pearl Harbor we’d have a problem there someday, and we’ve known this would be a problem, too,” he said.

Chosing Linux over Prostitution

Never take a job just for the money. I did and I'm sort of regretting it.

I've been out of work for a couple months now. I've had plenty of interviews, but I'm just not able to seal the deal. Anyhow, I accepted a contract position at a TV company here in Aberdeen. It feels like such a small town here.

Make no mistake, this is no glitzy London position. I'm not doing producing as I have in the past, I'm doing something far more rudementry. I'm doing tech work. I was hoping my days of tech work were behind me.

When the chips are down, some women turn to prostition, I turn to Linux. I am configuring video severs and web services.

One thing I find REALLY annoying is that right now I'm not working with live video streams. This means that we are using video loops instead. I am watching the same 3-minute video loop over and over again. Well, none other than Mr.MusicBiz makes an appearance in the video loop. Things ended really well between us, so there are no hard feelings- it's just weird to see him on TV over and over and over again.

I find this video work really easy to do. I also find it really unchallanging and boring. The only reason why I took this job was because there was nothing else on offer and I was more or less desperate. Doing this position in London would make me sort of desperate-- butthe fact that this position is in Aberdeen and I've had to stay in a B&B makes me extremely desperate. Also, what does it say about Scotland that they can't find anyone here to do this work?

The office I'm in is so nondescript and boring, it must have been designed by a man; Most likely the man that deisgned Windows 3.11.

The office is in a nondescript building. The building looks just like ten other buildings in the immediate area. It's not even in Aberdeen proper; it's set out in the 'burbs so you have to drive here.

There are about 50 people here, half of which are Scotish. The guy that sits next to me is Welsh. And the only other girl at the company sits across from me. She's Pakistani, with a thick accent. Between her, the Welsh dude next to me and 25 Scotish people around the office i cannot understand a single thing people are saying!

I feel really embarraasssed to ask people to repeat themselves. I have already said, "Can you repeat that?" about twenty times today. They must think I'm really thick! I think they are also really confused why I came up here from London- as they all seem to want to go down to London to work.

One good thing about working in TV technology is that I'm alwasy surrounded by men. My God, if I were single I'd have the pick of the litter. There is only one other girl here and she's a married minger. (I know, I'm being cruel.)

The B&B I stayed in last night was OK. I had trouble sleeping. I miss my boyfriend. In a peverse way, I think it's good that I'm getting away for a few days. Being away from him makes me realize how much I miss him and love him.

Anyhow, I better get back to work. The video servers await!

I'm Fucking for Free (So You Wanna Be A London Call Girl?)

I'm Fucking for Free (So You Wanna Be A London Call Girl?)

Everyone has been hit hard by the recession: Bankers, lawyers, factory workers, etc. There is one profession, however, that never goes out of style: Prostitution; Being a call girl, vice girl, escort, courtesan, concubine. Whatever you call it, it’s getting paid for having sex.

Meet the Girls

I sat down with 3 London Call girls, and their agency representative for a chat. The first girl, Candy, was a blond-haired blued-eyed babe from Eastern Europe. She had been in London for 8 years and worked in health care.

The second girl, Ebony, was a 6 foot tall, thin dark-skinned woman from Nigeria. She had large welcoming eyes, full lips and high cheekbones. It struck me as odd because she could have been model yet she’s gone into prostitution instead. Ebony was university student at a London university.

The third girl, Alice, was also a university student. She was originally from Nottingham. She was buxom size 18UK (14 US) English babe. I was amazed at how plain she was. She was quite pretty but didn’t fit in with my preconceived notions of a call girl. She was the sort of girl that you’d find behind the counter of a fish and chips shop.

The Agency
Richard was the man running the agency. To use the word agency implies that there were many people on staff in a crowded office. Instead, the sense I got from Richard was that he was one-man band: He found the girls. He made the bookings. He checked the identity of the clients. He answered the phones to make sure the girls ‘checked in.’ He set the prices and collected the money from the girls.

He was perfectly nice individual, but I couldn’t help but notice an air of seediness about him, but I could have been projecting how I felt about the situation.

The truth be told, the only way I could get a meeting with the girls and the agency was if I were to pretend that I wanted to be call girl too. What can I say, anything for a story.

Before the meeting with Richard and the other 3 other potential call girls. I was e-mailed a PDF version of a brochure explaining a bit out the agency.

Our Ideal Girls

Our clients have very varied tastes and in general there is no particular type or girl we work. Ages, looks and figures all vary. Generally we work with girls from 18 to 35 and from size 4 to size 20. We want girls who are reliable and easy to get along with.

What is involved in escorting?

Escorting is essentially entertaining men for money. Exactly what you deem as entertainment is down to you. You should bear in mind that most potential clients are interested in a sexual element. If you are not happy with this you may find that you have very few appointments.

Financial information

The exact fees our escorts charge vary from girl to girl and are decided by the escort. Most of our girls earn between £100 and £200 an hour after paying our agency commission, though some do earn a great deal more.

The Law
Prostitution, under certain conditions is perfectly legal within the United Kingdom. Street walking / kerb crawling is illegal. Brothels are illegal. Controlling prostitution for gain, i.e. being a pimp is illegal. Laws vary slightly in Scotland.

It is legal, however, to exchange sex for money in your own residence, hotel or the residence of the client. It is legal to be an escort without an agency attached. You would basically be an independent contractor.

It is legal to be an escort with an agency, however, the legality of the agency is nebulous; as they more or less would provide the services of pimp. In a court of law, the agency would argue that the escort is being hired for her time and that there was no prior knowledge of sexual activity. Legally, that may stand up in court, but in practice you are being paid to have sex. The agency knows and promotes that.

Why
I asked each of the girls why they were doing it. Most of the reasons they gave varied. In the end, it all boiled down to money. They would rather spend 2-3 hours per week being an escort rather than working 8 hours a day sweeping the streets or serving fries at McDonalds.

Alice had mentioned that she really liked sex and that her love life is dry. “Well, I could put up a post on Gumtree looking for a shag buddy. Or I could do this get paid for it” There’s part of me that understood that logic completely. I wondered, if I weren’t doing a story is this something I would be able to do? Could I do it and blog about it? I could be the new Belle de Jour. Hm, possibly not.

Morally
Is it morally dubious? Yes, of course it is. You can’t get around that. Even if the money is great, even if you love what you’re doing there’s a stigma against prostitution. Would you be able to tell your mother that you were a prostitute? What if my co-workers found out? Would I ever be able to be a Member of Parliament? How would my boyfriend feel about it?

What You’ll Have To Do
After some brief introductions and background on the agency we were given an exhaustive list sexual activities and asked to rate them. We had to rate each activity as to what the likelihood is that we would do it?

• Blindfolds
• Bondage (light)
• Bondage (heavy)
• Bondage (public, under clothing)
• Leather restraints
• Chains
• Ropes
• Harnesses (leather)
• Harnesses (rope)
• Cuffs (leather)
• Cuffs (metal)
• Manacles & Irons
• Gags (rubber)
• Gags (tape)
• Gags (phallic)
• Gags (ring)
• Mouth bits
• Full head hoods
• Mummification/saran wrapping
• Straight jackets
• Sleepsacks
• Spreader bars
• Spanking
• Flogging
• Single-tail whips
• Canes
• Belts
• Leather straps
• Riding crops
• Hairbrushes
• Wooden paddles
• Breast slapping
• Breast whipping
• Pussy/cock whipping
• Slapping/Punching (back, buttocks, chest)
• Strapping (full body beating)
• Hair pulling
• Face slapping
• Vaginal sex (with condom)
• Vaginal sex (without comdom)
• Vaginal sex to completion (without condom)
• Oral sex
• Swallowing semen
• Hand jobs (giving)
• Hand jobs (receiving)
• Anal sex (with condom)
• Anal sex to completion (without condom)
• Anal plugs (small)
• Anal plugs (large)
• Anal plug (public, under clothes)
• Anal beads
• Figging/radishing
• Vaginal dildo
• Vibrator on genitals
• Dilation
• Masturbation
• Fisting (vaginal)
• Fisting (anal)
• Speculums (vaginal)
• Speculums (anal)
• Oral/anal play (rimming)
• Double penetration (oral and vaginal)
• Double penetration (oral and anal)
• Double penetration (vaginal and anal)
• Triple penetration
• Forced homosexuality
• Forced masturbation
• Phone sex (serving Dom)
• Phone sex (serving Dom's friends)
• Strap-on-dildos (penetrated by)
• Strap-on-dildos (sucking on)
• Strap-on-dildos (wearing)
• Group Sex
• Outdoor sex
• Orgasm control
• Sexual deprivation (short term)
• Sexual deprivation (long term)
• Swapping (with one other couple)
• Swinging (multiple couples)
• Threesomes (two male, one female)
• Threesomes (one male, two females

After we finished filling out the form Richard then accessed the activities we agreed to along with our overall look. The goal, apparently, was to make us as marketable as possible. I was quite vanilla in my answers.

Candy and Alice got the highest rates. £300 per hour before commission. I was surprised that Alice got that rate. Apparently there is a lack of authentic English women within the escort world. When they do come about they are paid handsomely.

Ebony’s rate was £200 per hour before commission. Compared to the other girls I was quite jealous. My rate was only £130 per night, however if I had agreed to swallowing cum my rate would have gone up to £150. Damn, my fear of swallowing has foiled me again!


Their Cut
The agency takes 25% off the first hour and 10% off the second hour. One a week each girl is to meet with the Agency to deliver the Agency’s cut of the money.

The Hours
Generally, the hours are flexible so that you can work in an appointment after work and on the weekends.

The Clients
There is a wide range of clients that require escort services. With Richard’s agency you were allowed to pick the type of client you want. For example I could say, “I only want educated Asian men between 20 and 40.” Everyone else would be excluded.

Marketing
In order to get on the agency’s ‘books’ you’re require to have several photos taken of you. Some of these photos must show or hint at sexual activity. These photos are then marketed on various websites. The agency also creates an individual website to promote the girls. In addition to that the agency will put a ‘fake’ post on Gumtree and Craig’s Lists in order to lure in clients.

I felt alright about the call girl thing until it came to the photo part. What if one of my co-workers saw me? What if one of my work clients saw me? The fear of potential embarrassment shook me out of my wannabe-Belle-de-Jour moment.

Richard kindly offered to step in as photographer and take nude pictures of me. He even suggested that I do a shoot with Ebony and that we take some photos together. Sensing the sleaze factor, I made my excuses and left.

I’m not sure if I have what it takes to be a call girl, but does feel nice knowing that If I chose I could be making over £100 an hour. In the meantime, I’ll keep fucking for free.